Was very emotional ytd midnite, upset, angry, hatred.. every negativity clouded my mind.
Thanks to those who were wif me ytd nite.
but, lol, couldnt control myself. sorry, but yea....
=[
really, dinnoe wads wrong wif her.
and its like not that i dunnoe im such a useless person.
dieting lately, its difficult when everyone wants to treat me to food =.=, preferrably no food, but strictly even so, non fat food only! and not after 8pm.rawr.
Anyway, went out wif my couzins and auntie, and my jie jie ytd.
I really love my jie, haha, she bought alot of things for me and i had alot of fun wif her. i miss u!
THANKS
Went church today.. i was desperate to get out of the house, im sorry if its such a stoopid excuse but yea.... was the like first time i went to church ALONE, walked in alone.. astonished. shocked. that i actually go back after like how many months of not going and listening to the pastor's msg.haa. but stepping in its like coming back to somewhere familiar but yet not familiar. its a weird feeling, but i tink overall today was okay? =/, haha, church had my favourite song, AmazingGrace, and pastor khong did the preaching which was, more enjoyable to me. Special thanks to MS and hwee, made today;s church not so bad today =]
ermm, then i went to dad's house for dinner, he bought storybooks for me, wadever that i requested... nice? =/ yeaps. i love my dad =] He listens to my part of story too.. He loves me. He does things for me. He helps me. He explains. He doesnt blame me. He cares. He teaches me. He lets me have a choice. I love him.
Captivated wif the books :
a million little pieces
a place called here
I watcheds spideyman 3 again... still felt alot for the storyline.. yups hatred and vengence can really bring great power, power so great that it devours you wholly. in everything we do, we have a choice to do wads right.. but why do i always seee myself choosing to do the bad one? =/ i feel like im the person, Eddie, who cant let go of the great demon of hatred and vengence and in the end dying along wif it as the explosion takes place.. Its still nice that the bells knocked the demon out. hah. its called venom? poison.. yeps...
Still cant help feeling emo and troubled.
I cant help but go back to my emo self. I dun get the unreasonable ways of life. I dun get it! Why am i always the one who does things. Why am i the one who gets blamed. Why am I the one who must listen everytime. Why am i the one who pple calls me as "unfeeling". Why am I the one whom is regarded as trash. Why do i mean nothing to everybody. Why am i just me. Why cant i believe some things. Why do i revert back to always the way i used to be. Why Why Why.. Why am i not strong enough. Why am i so ever weak. Why do you expect so much of me. Why cant i just do it. Why cant i be the way who u ever wanted. Why is life like this. Why do i always feel so inadequate. Why am i getting used to hiding when i dun wanna face up. Why am i getting used to being someone im not for all to see.
Im so into jianfei-ing again, especially before going to hongkong! rawr!
11:41 AM
______________________________
Monday, November 10, 2008
Its been long since I've last posted anything here, have been busy wif various things, but probably not exams~ haha. Well, Im like such an ultimate slacker that it doesnt even make a difference that exams are ending tmr! lol.
Anyway, had alot of fun at haidie. It seems that we can never judge a person's character just based on one occassion, its came to me that haidie teachers are ALL ver professional and nice to be with. Xue ling, Xiao Ke and Sandy, they're all ver ver nice.. Its amazing how these teachers are willing to sacrifice their time for their students. For XueLing lao shi, there were two occassions in which I found ver amazing, Once was when another student not in my class told her that one of his classmate was having difficulty wif dancing, and wanted to quit dancing. Xue ling was ver nice and told him to continue to encourage that guy and she will discuss it wif the dance teacher Xiao Ke, another occassion is when she told one of my classmate that she would help her prepare for an audition after class. Its like so nice rite? She really din nid to, especially since she arent really that close to us as compared to others. For Sandy laoshi, hah shes really patient when shes teaching. Many of us were having trouble catching up especially some of my classmates who had never really played the piano properly before. Well, she sat down and taught them, explain and shes really nice when she do so. =] HAH, she never scolds lol.. For Xiao Ke lao shi, I really nid to thank her alot. HAH, although strict at times she can be ver nice too. LOL, she helped us to act in a video. HAH.. lol, when i seriously thought that she wun.. STRESSED.. acting wif her, later i NG i die! geez.. Well, doing the video editting, when its finished, i nid your help to vote too!~~ so hee watch out.
Next, haha, ytd i went around the whole of town looking for L_____ some of u might noe. yeps, its tiring luhh.. HEE oh and then i met my couzin and went in continuition looking for L____. HAH, till its at nite. we went pass Clarke Quay, and i decided to spend some time there. HAH, realised that Singapore can ber ver nice at night, esp since Clarke Quay, the usual pub areas are not so crowded on Sunday nights. So, the atmosphere was really nice, calm and soothing. We sat by the water and looked at the night lights. HEE... NICE~~~~ , i shall visit there again when im free.
Some PICS:
HAH, anyway congrats to those who made it to Campus Super Star 2009 round2~ jyjy peeps.!
Was looking at this vid, many memories, some of u mite find it familiar haha. =]
11:39 AM
______________________________
PROFILE
[Name]Shi Ying
[egg crack]18th Nov 1992
[skoOl]PL(S)
[CCA]Badminton/D ARTS
[Hobbies]Acting/Singing/Dancing
[Height] 164.5cm
[Spoken languages]English, Chinese and Rojak Dialects
[Music Schools]Lee Wei Song school of music - 2004
Music Story - 2006-2007
Hai Die ( Music Forest) - 2008
[Competitions]CSS ( 1 and 2 )
Teenage Icon Finalist 2007
School Competitions
[Performances]Community Centers Events
RCC Events
Outside Performances - Performing Group of MS
Teenage Icons- Teenage Bday Bash at DXO 2007
Loves
Fann
FCBC
SF
PL
My fwens
Computer
TIs
singing
acting
dancing
experiences
handphone
Wislist
1. Pink or Red and Black Laptop 2. Pink or Red and Black DS nintendo
3. More pooh bears
4. More bags =]
5. More clothes
6. Renovate my room
7. Nice watches
8. Pets (dogs or rabbits)
*Hope my ambitions/dreams can come true*
Ambition: Actress/Singer
Wants: To grow taller
Needs: To get slimmer
Aspire: To improve in acting and singing
Wishes: To learn acting,dancing and singing
Hopes : For joy and love
Thinks : Of getting whiter and prettier (like how i dunnnoe)
Sees: Getting into Mediacorp as my goal
Believes: That hardwork do pay off
Tries: TO do better in studies
Pray: That dreams do come true